A few weeks ago, my little girl fell out of bed during the night. She was crying when I went in to 'rescue' her. I picked her up to cuddle her so I could calm her down enough to tell me what happened. When she was able to talk between sobs, she pointed to the blankets she'd been wrapped up in that were now on the floor. "Those blankets don't work!" she cried to me.
Her comment made me laugh. Everyone I told laughed because it was cute. She fell out of the bed and thought it was because the blankets didn't work. Then I started thinking about it. How often do we blame things or people other than ourselves when things go wrong? She fell out of the bed because she had rolled too close to the side. It had nothing to do with the blankets. In life, how often do we reap the consequences of our own choices and then blame others or things or situations when in reality it is our own fault?
When I was a teacher, I had a student who got in trouble for breaking a serious rule. He was expelled as a result of his action. I saw him a year later, still not graduated from high school - even though all his friends had graduated by then. He was still angry about having been kicked out of the school. He blamed the teacher who had turned him in to the principal. He thought she was just out to get him. He blamed the students who were with him. He blamed the principal for not being sensitive to his situation. He blamed everyone and everything except the one place where the blame actually lay- with himself. HE broke the rule and then had to reap the consequences.
Just a thought. It would be a happier world if we could all just accept responsibility and place blame in ourselves when it deserves to be there. How many wars could we avoid if everyone did that? How much crime would be dissolved if there was no need for revenge because people accept responsibility for their own actions? How many of us would have more friends if we did this?
My goal is to accept blame when I am guilty and to forgive others when the blame is theirs. I challenge everyone to do the same.
I think this is a challenge for everyone. The "natural man" is defensive and wants to place blame elsewhere. I'm so thankful I was taught the young women values, specifically Choice and Accountability. That was honestly the first time in my life I did some true, deep self-reflection and realized I really had faults and weaknesses and had to accept accountability for my choices. Prior to that time, I thought the world revolved around me and owed me success without works. I was entitled to happiness, right? Haha! I had a lot to learn! Still do! Good thought!
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