At the Pool

 Right now, three of my girls are in swimming lessons.  That means that for two weeks, we are spending an hour at the pool every day.  I had a cool experience there last week that I wanted to share.

We do our lessons at Sand Hollow Aquatic Center.  For those of you who have never had the chance to go there, let me explain how it is laid out.  When you first walk in, you see the registration desk.  In the area surrounding the registration desk, there is a lobby with tables and chairs.  This lobby is separated from the pool by a wall of windows that looks out on the pool.

The second day of lessons, I was sitting at one of the tables with my computer.  (I had the joy of needing to work at the pool.  However, that is one of the perks of working from home- you can still do things that you wouldn't be able to do from an office.)  While I worked on my computer, my focus was on the computer screen rather than on the things happening in the lobby around me.  I was aware of a lot of people talking and a baby crying, but I was not really paying attention to any of that.

At one point, I stopped working so I could watch my girls in the pool for a few minutes.  I then realized the source of the crying.  There was a little boy, about a year old, standing at the door to the pool crying.  He was looking through the big windows and just sobbing. I assumed he wanted to get in the water with his older siblings.  I have had to take three of my crying toddlers to the pool while their older siblings took lessons.  It isn't fun, and sometimes there just isn't a way to cheer them up.  I felt bad for the family of this little boy.

After a few minutes of watching my girls in the pool and snapping pictures, I turned my focus back to my computer.  After I did this, I noticed an older lady approach the crying little boy and his sister who was standing with him.  She asked the older sister why he was crying.  I could not hear her response, but I did hear the lady react.  Very loudly and badly.  She said something to the effect of, "So your mom is out there TEACHING?"

I then gathered that the little girl was actually babysitting her little brother while mom was teaching a class.  She was doing a good job with him.  However, sometimes nothing but mommy will do, and that was the situation for that day.  Several of the other parents were really upset that this mom had left the kids in the lobby while she taught.  I admit that I began to feel the same way.  The negative feelings in the room were contagious.

After about ten minutes of people muttering about how the mom had .... (fill in the blanks with your own complaints- the list was quite long and varied, and nearly 100% unfounded), another mom stood up.  She went over to the little boy, picked him up, and then asked the sister their names.  She took him away from the window, so he couldn't see his mom, and pulled out some toys to play with.  That didn't quite calm him down, so she bought them each a treat from the concessions stand.  Finally, he stopped crying.  One of the other ladies who had been complaining, gave her a very deep THANK YOU.

I found myself realizing two things.  1) Negative feelings are REALLY contagious.  I was ashamed I'd ever felt annoyed.  There was nothing to be annoyed about.  Kids cry.  The whole world knows this.  2) I wish I'd been the one to help instead of judge.

The rest of the week, this amazing mom actually brought stuff for this little family to do, and took it upon herself to help the little girl watch the baby brother.  She may have been just as annoyed as all the other parents in the lobby that first day.  However, the way she reacted to it was very different.  Instead of complaining about problems, we should be finding solutions.  (After all, the mom if this little boy was stuck. If you don't have childcare, you don't have childcare...  MOST of the time, the brother was happily playing with his sister.  It was beyond anyone's control that the one day he really wanted mom.)

This made me think.  There are infinite things in the universe that will cause us to feel frustration, annoyance, anger, etc.  And those feelings are contagious.  Even if you don't start out feeling negatively about things, other people speaking out about their feelings can influence you to start feeling that way as well.  But rather than just sitting and complaining, we should be finding solutions.  Then we should ACT on those solutions. 

(Side note- if you can't think of a solution, perhaps it's time to stop complaining about that thing.)

Just my thoughts.

Termites

 A few months ago, we were getting our backyard ready to have a wedding there.  (Thanks, COVID....)  Our backyard is full of railroad ties that were placed to terrace the yard, build stairs, etc. They were really popular twenty-thirty years ago when the yard was designed.  They are now old, disgusting, rotting, etc.  But especially UGLY.  They are still functional (well, most of them), but they were not really up to par for wedding decor.

Because we wanted the yard to look a little nicer for the wedding, Scott pulled out the railroad tie stairs and put in brick stairs.  (Broke his finger doing that, but that's another story.  You can still tell which ones he did and which ones I tried to finish- the ones I did have all fallen over. Oops.)  That looked so much nicer that I tore out a few other railroad ties that seemed more in the way than functional.  We made a pile of debris next to the garage, and once we had most of the manual labor done in the backyard, I started making trips to the dump.

As Anna and I loaded up the van for what seemed like the gazillionth time (seriously, the lady at the dump recognized us by the end.... so embarrassing), we started having trouble with the railroad ties. The ones that had been stairs were small and we could easily load them.  However, the ones that had been for terracing were really big and heavy.  We decided that maybe if we tried to cut them into smaller pieces, we'd be able to move them more easily.  We cut with a saw as well as prying pieces that were loose off with shovels.  We finally made progress getting them into the van.

However, we dropped one that we had cut and shoveled.  When we picked it back up, I found a little pile of live termites on the ground where it had landed.  We put it back down and stomped on them.  Then I sprayed a TON of spider killer on the tie and the surrounding area.  (I had no idea if that would kill termites, but it was all I had, so I figured it was better than nothing.)  We then got rid of all the debris and finished our trips to the dump.

We made the yard look nice for the wedding.  But we also learned something.  We need to start systematically getting rid of ALL the railroad ties in the yard- not just the ones that were in the way for the wedding.  If we hadn't tried to cut and shovel the one that we dropped, we wouldn't have learned that there was a danger lurking there.  Now we know, and we can take steps to eliminate the problem before it becomes an actual problem.  (So far they are happy in the railroad ties.  But that won't last forever, and then they could move to the house.)

We have spiritual termites, too.  We can't see them, and there may or may not be any evidence of them on the outside.  But they are there.  Fortunately, Heavenly Father has already told us how to eliminate the problem before it causes serious danger.  He gave us a prophet to follow.  If we follow the prophet and do what he asks us to do (the FIRST time) with a good attitude, we will begin systematically removing all our spiritual termites.  

We may not see any outward differences, but it will feel better and we will have the comfort of knowing we are safe. Just a thought.

The Mask

 Sometimes our biggest blessings come from being able to watch someone else be blessed.  I had this type of experience last week.  I had taken two of my girls, Anna (12) and Emily (3) on an errand.  Emily wanted her window open in the car, so I rolled it down.  A few minutes later she started screaming and crying, "MY MASK!! MY MASK!!!!"  She was so beside herself.  Turns out, she'd been holding her mask (the cool rainbow one from Grandma Diane) in her hand- out the window.  (I know, face palm...  But she's three and had no idea why that was a bad idea.  Oh well. She does NOW...)

I got to a spot where we could turn around so we could go back for her mask.  I had no idea if we'd be able to find it.  It was a busy road with a lot of traffic, and we had quite a stretch of road it was possible for her mask to be hiding in.  We drove all the way down the road, looking for the mask.  We didn't see it.

So, we turned around and started going the other way.  I had my eyes turned to the opposite side of the road from where we were now driving- the side we'd been on when she'd dropped it.  Anna, however, was listening to the spirit.  She was looking at the curb right outside her window.  After a minute, she spotted it.  

We found a side street to stop in, and Anna ran through a dirt field to retrieve the mask.  Emily was ecstatic to have it back.  When we finally got to the place we had originally been heading, she jumped out of the car, ran to Anna, gave her a big hug, and said, "Thank you for getting my mask!"

This was a cool experience for me as a mom for several reasons.

1) It was really important to Emily that we find her mask.  She loves that mask, and hates wearing any other mask.  She is only three and is still learning about prayer.  But Heavenly Father answered the prayer in her heart, even though she didn't really understand how to voice it.

2) Anna had a really cool experience she will always remember.  She listened to the spirit and was looking opposite of where logic said the mask would be.  And she found it.  It helped so much more that the mask was retrievable and still wearable- only two tire tracks.

3) Sometimes the spirit helps us, even when it isn't important in the eternal scheme of things.  In six months, Emily won't remember the mask.  It doesn't affect her eternal salvation.  And she'd have been fine, albeit sad, without the mask.  But Heavenly Father loves her, and decided her prayers should be answered, even if she hadn't been able to voice it.

This is just one more piece of evidence that Heavenly Father and Jesus love us and that the spirit is here to guide us.

Just a thought. :)

Writing Down Our Experiences

 So, it's been a couple years since I posted anything.  Life has been busy. :) 

In both Sacrament Meeting and Relief Society people talked about the benefits of writing down our spiritual experiences so we could read them later on.  I have been thinking about that, and decided to write them down here. I've been wanting to get back into my blog for a while, so this is a good way to combine the two. :)   Some of these I may have already shared, but oh well. :) These are the experiences I thought about today that I wanted to make sure I wrote down.

When I was in college and my dad was in the hospital, we all knew he would be leaving us soon.  I got the call from my mom to come as quick as possible because it was time to say goodbye at about 7 one morning.  As I was preparing to leave, I quickly wrote down the phone numbers for each member of my bishopric and put the small paper in my wallet.  I figured I'd need to call one of them when it was all over just to give them the update.  They knew the situation and I figured I'd need to keep everyone posted.  Well, we got in a bad car accident on the way home and I never made it down there before my dad died.  In fact, I was at Brother Owens' house (a member of my bishopric) when I got the call that he was gone.  Didn't need those phone numbers after all.  Or so I thought...  After Christmas break a couple weeks later, my mom was bringing me back up to Logan.  Something happened to her car, and we had to pull into a gas station.  It died completely.  We weren't sure what to do.  Then I remembered that I had put the phone numbers for the bishopric members in my wallet. I was able to go into the gas station and use a phone (that was back before everyone had cell phones) and call my bishop. He sent help and we got me back to my apartment and my mom made it back to her house okay.  So while I didn't need the phone numbers for what I originally thought I was being prompted to put them in my wallet for, I still needed them, and for something that felt like a much bigger blessing than simply getting some emotional support.  We were literally rescued as a result.

The year I turned 25, our prophet, President Hinckley, and the First Presidency of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints asked every member to read the entire Book of Mormon by the end of the year.  That started in August, so we had a few months to complete it.  We were promised very big blessings if we complied with this request.  At the time this challenge came out, I was just starting the process of applying for grad school. I really wanted to get a Master's Degree in British Literature.  I really wanted the blessing of being accepted into grad school, so I decided that I would read the Book of Mormon TWICE in the time frame given for the challenge.  I did NOT get accepted into grade school.  I was really disappointed.  However, instead of being blessed with what I originally set out trying 'earn', I was blessed with what I wanted more- Scott.  During that time I met and married Scott.  And that was a much bigger and more eternal blessing than a Master's Degree ever could be. :)

I have had quite a few other experiences, most small, but some more poignant.  If I were to try to pin one down as the day I got a testimony, I wouldn't be able to because I have had so many over the years.  But it's still really nice to reflect back on some of these experiences that helped me know the Lord loves me.  I hope we can all start to reflect back on past experiences and actively look for new experiences as we try to build our relationship with our Father in Heaven.

Testimony of a Child

I had a fun experience with Katie Sunday evening that I thought I'd share.  We were up in my room, and Katie was playing various games she was inventing with the books on my bookshelf.  She decided that each of the books was a note book (in her game, meaning a book full of music notes for the songs she started inventing). 

She would lay the books in a row or another pattern, then tell me what each book had a song for (a theme of some kind), and then have me choose a book for her to sing from. She would then hold up the book (all of which were novels, not music books of any kind, making the game that much more fun for Mommy) and begin to sing the song to me.

There was a definite theme to her game.  All of the songs had something to do with Jesus and how he loves us.  In one song, she sang about how Jesus had all of us in his hands.  (She'd heard the song, "He's Got the Whole World in His Hands" for the first time earlier that day, so while her song was nothing like the one everyone is now singing in his/her head, it had that same message.)  In another, she simply sang how He loves us over and over again.

We had one stray song that really made me laugh. She went from Jesus loves us to a song about how Jesus teaches us to make paper boats.  Her song said he teaches us to make paper boats because he helps with everything, or something like that. It was a really cute tangent. I would love to know where the paper boat came from. To my knowledge, she's never made a paper boat. :)


It was an enchanting evening. She went full force with this game for over an hour, and every single song was about Jesus.  Most were simply about how He loves us.  Each one was slightly different, but all had that same message.

Sometimes, we feel like if we don't know everything about religion, God, Jesus, how the world works, etc. that we don't know enough.  But really, what's important? Jesus Christ loves me, He died for me, and then he rose again on the third day so that I can live with Him again.  If we go through life knowing nothing more than Katie shared in her little song-tesimonies, isn't that enough?

Just a thought.

The Cushions

So Scott and I both woke up this morning feeling a little grouchy due to lack of sleep.  (Ashley is 15 months now, so we should be getting sleep sometime in the next 15 years, right??)  We decided it was time to clean the cushions on the couch, since it's been a while and they were starting to get pretty dingy. 

I don't know if you've ever cleaned upholstery, but it's pretty hard work.  I'm exhausted now that it's done, and Scott did 90% of the hard labor.  We have a large sectional couch, so there was a LOT to be done.  Even with the upholstery cleaner thingy (technical term- I promise...) that Scott has, it was still very labor-intensive. 

As we were working together, Scott commented that even though he doesn't like cleaning the couch, doing the work with me was lifting his mood. I realized that I felt the same way. 

This taught me two things.  1) Working hard doesn't have to be work, especially if you do it with someone. You can make just about any task a good experience if you choose to.  (Also, this was just as bonding as a traditional date like going to dinner.  Time together doesn't have to be fancy.)
2) Work is a good thing.  A lot of times, we spend so much time scurrying to get things done that we miss out on the experiences we could be having.  Physical labor has inherent mood-lifting effects due to hormones that are released, etc.  You will always have a better mood after doing physical labor if you keep a positive attitude about it.  Also, the sense of accomplishment from the work has very good mood-lifting effects.

It's important to let ourselves rest. It's also important not to overbook ourselves and cause ourselves stress.  But it's also important not to focus so much on leisure that we become lazy.  Laziness causes depression.

Just a thought. :)

The Blanket

So it's been a while since I posted anything. I had a baby, and didn't post during most of my pregnancy. She's now 6 months old and a little less intensive care-wise so maybe I'll post more often now.  (It isn't her fault I haven't posted, but I'm using her as an excuse anyway...)

This weekend I had an experience that made me really want to start posting again.  You hear on the news or in places like Reader's Digest about kind strangers helping out, but I'd never actually experienced it before.  This weekend I did.

I took my three girls up to my mom's this past weekend.  It's winter up there.  We live in St. George, which is Southern Utah, and winter here means almost chilly rather than cold.   As a result, my girls didn't have the greatest cold-weather attire.  My bigger girls made do.  The baby spent a lot of time wrapped up in a blanket if we weren't inside.

On the drive home (a four and a half hour drive usually), Ashley (the baby) was DONE being in the car seat.  She cried for an hour or so before we hit the park we usually stop at in Fillmore.  At this park, I pulled her out of the car seat and made a bottle, thinking maybe she was hungry.  Well, it was only about 16 degrees in Fillmore. I got the big girls in their coats, but didn't have much for the baby.  I put her on a blanket on the seat of the car, changed her diaper, and then rushed all three girls into the convenient store to get out of the cold while the baby ate her bottle.


In my flurry of excitement trying to get everyone inside and out of the cold, I left the blanket on the seat of the van.  I didn't go back for it because we were only 20 steps away from being inside anyway.  While I walked around the store with my girls (feeding the baby, which was NOT easy because she's big and wiggly), a lady walked up to me and asked if I had a blanket for the baby.  She told me she had one if I needed it. 

This flustered me because I realized how it must look that I had this baby in a onesie and no blanket.  I told her that I had one, but that the baby had just made a mess out of it.  (I am really not sure why I added this little fib on the end.  Like I said, I was flustered and guess just momentarily needed a response beyond 'it's in the van and I'm an idiot.')  She told me she had a clean one, and again I told her I didn't need it.

Just before we left the store to go back to the van and get on the road home, a young boy about ten came up to me with a blanket. He told me his grandma had told him to give it to me. I thanked him and asked him to thank his grandmother.  (Poor kid was really embarrassed, but what a good grandma to let him take part in that charitable giving.)  I wrapped Ashley up in the blanket and we went to the van. 

It was a NICE blanket, and much better than the one I had easy access to in the van.  I wrapped her up in it for the remainder of the drive home.


I was really grateful to this woman who had seen a need and filled it, despite being told no thank you.  No, we didn't need it like it looked like we needed it.  But she saw a need and filled it.  I will always think back on this experience with fondness.  There is a lot of evil in the world today.  Watch the news and you can't miss it.  But what doesn't make the news is that there is SO MUCH good in the world.  This woman intended to give me a blanket, but she gave me a much bigger gift in addition to the blanket- renewed faith in mankind.  I think most people out there are good people trying to do what's right and help people.  This experience proved me right, and I am so glad to have experienced it.


Sometimes we need to fill apparent needs even if the intended recipient doesn't ask for it.  You never know who you might help- even if it isn't in the way you intended it.  Just a thought.